Saturday, April 9, 2016

The Cruise

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says 'I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.'

The bartender says, 'Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink.

As the woman finishes her drink the woman to her right says, 'I would like to buy you a drink, too.'

The old woman says, 'Thank you.

Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.'

'Coming up,' says the bartender.

As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, 'I would like to buy you one, too.'

The old woman says, 'Thank you.'

Bartender, 'I want another Scotch with two drops of water.'

'Coming right up' the bartender says. As he gives her the drink, he says 'Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?'

The old woman replies, 'Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor, but holding your water is a whole other issue.'

Hat tip: Jerry T.
Image Credit: Mobile Cuisine
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42 comments :

  1. LOL, That is way too funny. I don't know if I would ever be able to learn how to hold my liquor though. I probably should have been more careful about laughing out loud too seeing as how I just had a glass of water :)

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    Replies
    1. Some people can hold their liquor and some can't. I agree with the water part though. :)

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  2. Oh, thank God I drink wine! lol y-)

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    Replies
    1. I drink Champagne, so I guess I'm good too. :)

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  3. Heeheehee! She knows her limits!

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    Replies
    1. She does seem to have her priorities well laid out too. :)

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  4. LOL - I though the punchline was going to be that she was scamming on her birthday.

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    1. Nope, she just knows what's more important. The scotch. :)

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  5. Oh my COD, that is funny. And ho so darn true. I really like this one. It strikes home for sure. Sandee, you and Zane have a wonderful day.

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    1. ♪♪Happy Birthday to you,♪♪
      ♪♪Happy Birthday to you,♪♪
      ♪♪Happy Birthday Dear Marg,♪♪
      ♪♪Happy Birthday to you.♪♪

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  6. Too funny! Like Rhonda, I thought it was going to be that she was scamming people. The real ending was much funnier.

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    1. Thanks Ellen, I thought so too. :)

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  7. Replies
    1. We old ladies know what's important in life. :)

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  8. Thanks Sandee now we know what's to come in later years lmao :-)

    Have a scotchtastic Saturday :-)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, and I'm already there. :)

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  9. With my prostate problem, I would knock off all water.
    Have a beautiful Saturday Sandee & Zane. See ya.

    Cruisin Paul

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    Replies
    1. Well scotch on the rocks works too. :)

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  10. Lol! No wonder I keep going to the loo because I only drink water!

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    1. Drinking water is a good thing Nancy. Much better for you than drinking lots of scotch. :)

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  11. Haha...pass the wine, please!

    Big hugs, honey...

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    Replies
    1. Merlot will do just fine won't it. :)

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  12. Gosh, that's funny and SO true.

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    Replies
    1. I agree that it's true. :)

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  13. Replies
    1. Perhaps scotch neat would be better. :)

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  14. This is so funny!!! LOL! :)

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    1. Thanks Linda. I got a chuckle out of it too. :)

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  15. She's a smart old lady.
    Have a great weekend!

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    1. She is indeed and she knows what's important in her drinks too. :)

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    2. Water takes up too much space...

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    3. I agree Mike. My best to Seymour. :)

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  16. That is not a joke!

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    Replies
    1. For some it's not, for others it is. :)

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  17. For fun, she should switch to beer.

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    Replies
    1. Oh she'll live in the restroom then. :)

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  18. Bwahaha! Oh my goodness now this is funny!!

    Thanks for the laugh :)

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    1. I know this lady too. :)

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  19. I don't know if she'll be holding any of it.

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    1. I thought so too, but she seems to do fine with little water. :)

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  20. First I laughed. Then I thought a lesson in physiology should be in store. Then I reminded myself that it's just a joke. It's a good way to score free drinks ;)

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    Replies
    1. It's working for her and that's the important part. :)

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