Outrageous Excuses For being Late to Work:
My heat was shut off so I had to stay home to keep my snake warm.
My husband thinks it's funny to hide my car keys before he goes to work.
I walked into a spider web on the way out the door and couldn't find the spider, so I had to go inside and shower again.
I got locked in my trunk by my son.
My left turn signal was out so I had to make all right turns to get to work.
A gurney fell out of an ambulance and delayed traffic.
I was attacked by a raccoon and had to stop by the hospital to make sure it wasn't rabid.
I feel like I'm in everyone's way if I show up on time.
My father didn't wake me up.
A groundhog bit my bike tire and made it flat.
My driveway washed away in the rain last night.
I had to go to bingo.
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