Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Life

On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

And God saw it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

And God, again saw it was good.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed it was good.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.

Hat tip: Linda W.
Image Credit: Image Chef
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48 comments :

  1. I like that one. It sure explains life in no uncertain terms. Sandee, you and Zane and Little Bit all have a great day.

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    1. It sure does Marg, and it explains it very well too. :)

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  2. Holy moly, that splains life so well! I will be on the porch...

    Big hugs, honey...

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    1. I'll come and join you honey. We might as well bark together. With some wine of course. :)

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  3. Somehow that is the best explanation of life I have heard. Brilliant.

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    1. It sure is Rhonda. Pretty accurate too. :)

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  4. Now I understand why I entertain my grandchildren. Ha,ha,ha. Have a wonderful Tuesday Sandee. See ya.

    Cruisin Paul

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    1. Yep, we are fun to watch aren't we. :)

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    1. I thought so too Joe. :)

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  6. Ha, who knew there was reasoning behind our common habits. :)

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  7. Right now, I think I'm in the stage of using up the housefly's time. I'm flying around and annoying everyone.

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    1. Well, I'm on the porch barking at everyone. We're both doing good work. :)

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  8. Another good one, Sandee.

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  9. Brilliantly explanation of life heheh!

    Have a lifetastic day Sandee :-)

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    1. Thanks Steve and you have a lifetastic day too. :)

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  10. Heeheehee! Excellent explanation!

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  11. Ha! I did not predict that ending.

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    1. I didn't either, but it was spot on. :)

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  12. BWHaaaaaaa....another good one.
    I have heard this one before, but I like it :))

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    1. You're too young for the porch, but that's where I'll be if you need me. :)

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  13. oh this is definitely a keeper! Big big hugs!

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  14. Haha! That was fun!

    Hope you're having a great week Sandee! Scritches to Little Bit!

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    1. We're in a horrible heatwave so we're staying indoors as much as possible. :)

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  15. I don't have grandchildren to do monkey tricks for, I hope that doesn't mean I lose those ten years :)

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    1. Nope, you'll keep your ten years, but you might have to do more porch time. That's better than working. :)

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    2. I am at the growl stage, but I do feel a bark coming on.
      My videos for day 3 disappeared for some reason. I had to put them back.

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    3. Oh, good to know as I don't have grand kids either. I love porch time! :)) xoxo

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    4. You're younger than I am Driller. You'll get to the barking soon enough. :)

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    5. Porch time rocks Barb, especially if there is a glass of wine involved. :)

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  16. Finally. The meaning of life.

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  17. Ha ha that is actually an AWWWWWWWW post! That is so bittersweet! I told my kids if I end up as "one of THOSE" old people to take me in the back yard and shoot me. They promised!

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    1. Oh I know what you're talking about. I know some of them and I avoid them. :)

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  18. OMG that was one of the most hilarious posts I have read in some time! This is a classic! xoxo

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    1. It's a classic indeed. The circle of life. :)

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  19. That is alarmingly true!

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    1. It is indeed Stephanie. :)

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  20. This is a really good one, Sandee! Thank you so much for sharing. :)

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    1. You're most welcome. My friend Linda sent it to me. :)

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  21. What a nice analysis of human life!

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  22. Replies
    1. The circle of life. :)

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