Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Installing Your Husband

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

***

DEAR DESPERATE,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.) Also do not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support

Image Credit: My LOOL Blog
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44 comments :

  1. 78uoi9.

    ^^^I just ran cat 3.0 and see what she can do? Adorable. And so entertaining, too. ;)

    srsly. She typed that all by herself.

    big hugs xoxo

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    1. I love this Barb. Gracie is so talented. Tons of scritches to the babies. ♥♥♥

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  2. obviously husband 1.0 has a lot of room for improvement :)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, it's not a very good operating system. :)

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  3. Too funny not to be shared :-D

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    Replies
    1. I agree. Share away. :)

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  4. This reminds me of a book I bought for a baby shower. It was an infant care book written like a computer manual, in language young techies would like. Some people are so clever when it comes to humor.

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    1. I thought this was very clever. :)

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  5. Now you women have programs for men. Ha,ha,ha. Are there programs for women so that we men can put in Ha,ha,ha. This program here, works very well when push the right button. LOL
    Have a wonderful day Sandee. See ya.

    Paul

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    Replies
    1. Yes, there are programs for women too. About the same take. :)

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  6. That probably is exactly what the world is going to come to. All they have to do is argue the percentages. Good one Sandee. Hope you and Zane and Little Bit have a wonderful day.

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    1. It could happen Marg. :)

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  7. Heeheehee! Yep, i remember that upgrade, and how awful it was!

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  8. Where can I download beer 6.!? Will the upgrade to 6.2 include Octoberfest?

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    1. That would be a great upgrade. Bwahahahahahaha. :)

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  9. I would still get a 404 error message!

    Smiles and hugs, honey...

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    1. I get that from time to time too honey. :)

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  10. I will not respond to this obvious husband bashing...unless my wife tells me to.

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    1. You crack me up Joe. There's one for women too. This makes up for all the dumb blonde jokes I do. :)

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  11. LOL I think a system restore is in order w-)

    Have a reboottastic day :-h

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    1. That's a great idea. :)

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  12. Lol. I recommend installing the system recovery discs, or if you have one of the newer models, activating the already installed system recovery and setting the date back, back, back to a time when your programs were more compatible. If that doesn't work, perhaps a reboot might be in order... right in the arse ;-)

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    Replies
    1. I like the reboot part the best. :)

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  13. Cooking 3.0 works in this house. My hubby's a sucker for a good meal. ;)

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    Replies
    1. Whatever works is my philosophy. :)

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  14. Bwahahahahahahaha!!!! DOES NOT COMPUTE!!!!!!!!! :-f :-h :D w-) d-)

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    Replies
    1. It doesn't have to Mike. You've got a great marriage. So do I. No complaints here. :)

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  15. LOL! If I could uninstall just a few things, I'd have Husband 5.0! That stubborn package is a buggar to get rid of!

    Hope you're enjoying a lovely day Sandee! Scritches to Little Bit!

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    Replies
    1. I so can relate to this. You've a good hubby though like I do, but sometimes... :)

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  16. I want to download beer 6.!. My beer lasts too long which means that I don't drink enough. I hear the upgrade to 6.2 did include Octoberfest but than only works in October.

    Also they won't work on Apple devices. I took Mrs. Jim's hp laptop away as she is doing pretty good without all this. I will make her performance evaluation again, probably at the year's end. :P
    ..

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    1. I want champagne 6.1. I'm just saying. :)

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  17. Cute! I remember the early version of this back in the 90s. It wasn't nearly this good!

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    Replies
    1. This one has been done many different ways. :)

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  18. Install the Ask 2.0 app and remove the Tell 9.4 app

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  19. Obviously it's time for a complete upgrade.

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  20. hahaha!! I need a new additional app to that husband 1.0- can anyone install Husband To Do Laundry app?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There is no such app. I looked too. :)

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  21. Ha!!! Hot Lingerie 7.7 is my favourite program

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    1. I'll bet it is Tony. :)

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  22. My Mother-in-law 1.0 completely died about 3 years ago. My Father in law recently installed an updated version & it runs much nicer. The update doesn't have grumpy 2.0 & bitchy 1.2 included.

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    1. Bwahahahahahahahaha. :)

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Thank you for stopping by my little corner of the blogosphere. All comments are very much appreciated.

♥♥♥Have a terrific day.♥♥♥