I will never be over the hill. I'm too darned tired to climb it!
Someone sent me an email about using vodka for cleaning the house. It worked! The more vodka I drank, the cleaner the house looked.
Middle Age: That time when you finally get your head together, then your body starts falling apart.
When a woman says, 'What?', it's not because she didn't hear you. She's giving you a chance to change what you said.
Why are there never any 'good' side-effects? Just once I'd like to read a medication bottle that says, 'May cause extreme sexiness'.
OMG, I'm rich! Silver in the hair, Gold in the teeth, Crystals in the kidney, Sugar in the blood, Lead in the butt, Iron in the arteries, and an inexhaustible supply of natural gas. I never thought I would accumulate such wealth.
Today I got my 'happy' pills and my 'ticked off' pills mixed up. I took one of each so now I'm ticked off but I'm happy about it.
I kind of feel sorry for the trees in the Fall... at least when I went though the change nothing fell off.
Hat tip: Babs of Beetle's Humour
Image Credit: Pinterest