Saturday, November 30, 2013

Valentines - Redneck Style

Yo're as cute as a junebug a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like no far ant upon which I oft' tread.

Cut from the best pattern like a flannel shirt of plaid,
You sparked up my life like a Rattletrap shad.

When you hold me real tight like a padded gunrack,
My life is complete; Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection, like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite all the years, yore age, it keeps hidin'.

And when you get old like a '57 Chevy,
Won't put you on blocks and let grass grow up heavy.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie, with a RC cold drank,
We go together like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart; It's romantic that way.

Some men git roses on that special day,
From the cooler at Kroger. "That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever," they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey, these will not do.
For you are too special, you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift, without taste nor odour,
Better than diamonds, it's a new trollin' motor.

Image Credit: HD Wallpaper
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16 comments :

  1. fun. Gotta love redneck humor.

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  2. Oh, those sweet nothings... skunk and stank. What could say love better than that! bahahaha!

    Hope your weekend is just perfect! big hugs xoxo

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  3. Oh yes the rednecks are another breed. Too funny. They are always doing something hysterical. Take care and have a great weekend..

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  4. Vinyl siding... snort

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  5. Dang, who be stealin my gun rack proposal to the my Mrs.? c-)

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  6. LOL... trolling motor! hahaahahahaha... that's funny!

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  7. Don't drool at her, guys. She's married to her youngest brother but he's the biggest of the 15.

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  8. LOL some good ones there have a good weekend

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  9. Bwa-ha-ha! That was PRICELESS. Oh my goodness. Amazing! LOL.

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  10. Yep! We've had holdiays like that, where he got me something he wanted. it always makes me laugh.

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  11. I'll have to share this with my brother.

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  12. i swear i'd rather be around a redneck than anyone. they just rock! total honesty and will help you anytime whatever you need.

    smiles, bee
    xoxoxoxoox

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  13. maybe I should send this to my husband, you know, just as a guide on where to buy the most romantic Valentines gifts :)

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  14. I think he better get trolling!

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  15. Very interesting and funny!

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  16. Cards with messages like this are hard to find. y-)

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