Sunday, June 2, 2013

Silly Sunday

Silly Sunday is the place to come for weekly laughs. The rules are simple, in fact if you don't like rules then just ignore the few that are posted below. This is a great opportunity to get to know other bloggers and have a laugh or two in the process. I'll do my very best to visit everyone's Silly Sunday post.

Here is how it works: Laugh and Link Up!
  • Blog about something funny, silly or laughable – a joke, comic, funny story, etc
  • Add the URL of your funny blog post on the Silly Sunday Linky for the week below.
The New Priest

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.

After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip."

So next Sunday he took the monsignors advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm.

Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following note on the door:

1. Sip the Vodka don't gulp.

2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.

3. There are 12 disciples,not 10.

4. Jesus was consecrated,not constipated.

5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.

6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.

7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the Spook.

8. David slew Goliath; he did not kick the shit out of him.

9. When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his ass.

10. We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T"

11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, "Take this and eat it for it is my body." He did not say, "Eat me."

12. The Virgin Mary is not called "Mary with the Cherry."

13. The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub,yeah God.

14. Next Sunday there will be taffy-pulling contest at St.Peter's, not a peter-pulling contest at St Taffy's.


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20 comments :

  1. Oh! dear he must have good carried away with the vodka LMAO

    Have a stupid Sunday ;-)

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  2. LOL, that must have been a huge gulp

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  3. He must've also been Irish because Irish + priest = dangerous. Ask me how I know this. :D

    Have an awesome day! big hugs xoxo

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  4. Tell us a story, Barb!

    Great one. I will probably be thinking of this in church this morning as I serve the chalice!

    Bg hugs from wet jawjah, honey...

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  5. buwhahaah, and I thought it was water in that glass...wait until I talk to our preacher. ;)

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  6. Oh dear,that is so funny. ROTFLMAO. Loved them all. y-)

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  7. Happy SILLY SUNDAY. Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar

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  8. This is hilarious! Thank you! (And I am a devout Catholic...with a sharp sense of humour!)

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  9. Hmmm.. I think the Priest was preaching to the minions in Chicago.

    Have a great Silly Sunday!

    Steve

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  10. This one had me literally laughing out loud.

    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com/2013/06/hey-my-young-google-plus-friends-this.html

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  11. roche' is rolling on the floor laughing at this one! especially the "stoned" part!

    smiles, bee
    xoxo

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  12. Sounds like me at the Ant's business meeting every night ...

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  13. good grief hahahah just how big was that glass?
    Have a fabulous day!

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  14. You are definitely silly, Sandy. Beas!!!

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  15. That must have been some great vodka! "Peter-pulling", ha!

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  16. The Vodka certainly took its toll Sandee!:) Enjoy the rest of your day.

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  17. My kind of sermon! LOL!

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  18. Well it was more entertaining than most.

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  19. Bet next week he'll be more careful on his amount of Vodka! lol sandie

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  20. This is one of the funniest things I have read in weeks! Thanks for some good laughs :)

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