Thursday, June 6, 2013

King Authur's Quest

King Arthur was getting ready to go on a Quest. He was worried about leaving his beautiful Queen Guinevere alone with all those lonely knights of the Round Table. So he went to his famous wizard, Merlin, for some advice. After explaining his predicament to Merlin, the wizard looked thoughtful and said to come back in a week and he'd see if he could come up with something.

A week later King Arthur was back in Merlin's laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention. It was a chastity belt... except it had a rather large hole in the most obvious place. 'This is no good, Merlin!' the king exclaimed, 'Look at this opening. How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the Queen?'

'Ah, sire, just observe.' said Merlin as he searched his cluttered workbench until he found what he was looking for. He then selected his most worn out wand, one that he was going to discard anyway. He then inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two.

'Merlin, you are a genius!' said the grateful monarch, 'Now I can leave, knowing that my Queen is fully protected.' After putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then set out upon his Quest.

Several years passed until he returned to Camelot. Immediately he assembled all his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their armour for an informal 'short arm' inspection. Sure enough! Each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in some way. All of them except Sir Lancelot.

'Sir Lancelot,' exclaimed King Arthur, 'The one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have been true to me. What is it in my power to grant you? Name it and it is yours!'

But Sir Lancelot was speechless.

Hat tip: Ron Russell of Totus
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23 comments :

  1. c-) Hardi-har-har-har!!! d-)
    I wasn't expecting that, Sandee.
    ..

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  2. c-) Yesterday afternoon I was at the library while Mrs. Jim and her buds were playing bridge.
    After reading a bit I turned my laptop on and saw that their KIDDIE FILTER had stopped my June 1 SILLY SUNDAY with a note in the YouTube box saying that this video was inappropriate for viewing off the library server.

    I think today's post would be filtered out also. :X
    ..

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  3. Knee slapper! Poor Lance.

    Big hugs, honey...

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  4. Got me! har har har!

    big hugs xoxo

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  5. That was somewhat a surprise but pretty darn funny. Poor Lancelot.
    Hope you are having a great day Sandee. Take care.

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  6. Well, he is French after all. y-)

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  7. It took me a minute, but I got it - lol. sandie

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  8. hilarious! I have the same problem as JIm has when I am at the library doing my volunteer job- since it's slow sometimes I surf the net and cannot access your blog becAUSE of the filter...pooh bear ......have a great day! Thanks for all the laughs...

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  9. Thanks for the plug Sandee. I heard that joke many, many years ago while sitting at a bar in Little Rock, Arkansas around the corner from the governors mansion---where Bubba Clinton was conducting his business while the state troopers were on lookout.

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  10. LOL that was funny will have to tweet that :-)

    Have a funtabulosa day

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  11. That was unexpected. They say that Lancelot was gifted with a silver tongue. And of all the knights, he was adored by Guinevere. Now I know why.

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  12. good one!! :-O :)) d-)

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  13. I shouldn't admit it but I had to think about that one for a minute....lol

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  14. LOL! Quite a story Sandee! Enjoy the rest of your Thursday.

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  15. Took me ages to get it..LOL just tired.. big hugs as always xx00xx

    Mollie and Alfie

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  16. Little Bit might not look like you but you have to use your imagination..BOL and we know you have one of those..Bawahwawwww hugs xxx

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  17. Haha, I knew it was going to end that way!

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  18. bwahahahahah! oh, and roche' didn't get it but i did!

    smiles, bee
    xoxo

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  19. (blushes)
    I got it!
    Bwahahaahahahaahahahaha!

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  20. Though speechless Sir Lancelot was wise enough to protect his 'small arm' which might be useful with the other lonely Lady of Shallot!

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  21. Cat got your tongue lance?

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  22. Ok,it took a few seconds, then I had a great laugh.

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