The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.
I have yet to find anybody who can give us a clear and compelling reason why we put the clocks forward every spring.
There is a very fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness.'
There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 11.
If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'
You should not confuse your career with your life (i.e., never confuse having a career with having a life!).
A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her.
When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy. (Your friends love you, anyway!)