Friday, February 24, 2012

British Hospitality

An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore the city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, and occasionally stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat with the lads, and have a pint of Guinness.

After awhile, he finds himself in a very high class neighborhood... big, stately residences... no pubs, no stores, no restaurants, and worst of all... NO PUBLIC RESTROOMS.

He really, really has to go, after all those Guinness's.

He finds a narrow side street, with high walls surrounding the adjacent buildings and decides to use the wall to solve his problem.

As he is unzipping, he is tapped on the shoulder by a London Bobby, who says, "I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know."

"I'm very sorry, officer," replies the American, "but I really, really HAVE TO GO, and I just can't find a public restroom."

"Ah, yes," said the bobby, "Just follow me."

He leads him to a back "delivery alley", then along a wall to a gate, which he opens.

"In there," points the bobby. "Whiz away sir, anywhere you want."

The fellow enters and finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has ever seen. Manicured grass lawns, statuary, fountains, sculpted hedges, and huge beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom.

Since he has the cop's blessing, he unburdens himself and is greatly relieved.

As he goes back through the gate, he says to the bobby, "That was really decent of you... is that what you call British Hospitality'?"

"No, sir" replies the bobby, "that is what we call the French Embassy."

Hat tip: Frank of Foxxfyrre's Honk'n'Holl'r


  1. Oh, the French wouldn't have minded.



    big hugs xoxo

  2. I was wondering where it was. . . funny. Thanks.

  3. That is too funny. Sounds like a good place to have some relief. Unless you are French, of course. Have a terrific weekend Sandee. Great sailing.

  4. Happy Friday!!

    Big hugs,

  5. Now I have to pee.

  6. Hahahaha! I believe it :) Have a great weekend, Sandee!

  7. Good one. I wondered where he was go.

  8. Bwahahaahahahahaa! Loved it!!!!

  9. oh GOOD one, made me think of john heald!

    smiles, bee

  10. Haha...John Heald would love this one!

    Have a fab Friday. Big hugs, honey...

  11. I had the same problem when I was touring London. I was not lucky to be showered with the British Hospitality.
    I enjoyed the joke.
    have a great day!

  12. That's hilarious. I can see it happening too.

  13. Those Brits and their wit!

  14. No love lost between the Brits and French. My granddaugher went to Rome last years and said the everywhere she went in the central city area it smelled of urine. Must be a common practice over there perhaps helped along by the wine.

  15. A little hostility there?

  16. Haha! brilliant :-)

    Have a great weekend :-0

  17. Now I wonder where a Frenchman would have sent him :)

  18. Fun-ny, Sandee! :)


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