A guy walks into a shoe store and asks for a pair of shoes, size 8.
The obviously well trained salesman says, "But sir, you take an 11 or eleven-and-a-half."
"Just bring me a size eight."
The sales guy brings them, and the man stuffs his feet into them and stands up in obvious pain.
He turns to the salesman and says, "I've lost my house to the I.R.S., I live with my mother-in-law, my daughter ran off with my best friend, my business has filed Chapter 11, and my son just told me he was gay. The only pleasure I have left is to come home at night and take my shoes off."