Monday, October 17, 2011

Cats

Punishing Your Human Being

Sometimes, despite your best training efforts, your human will stubbornly resist bending to your whim. In these extreme circumstances, you may have to punish your human. Obvious punishments, such as scratching furniture or eating household plants, are likely to backfire--the unsophisticated humans are likely to misinterpret the activities and then try to discipline YOU. Instead, we offer these subtle but nonetheless effective alternatives:
  • Use the cat box during an important formal dinner.
  • Stare impassively at your human while it is attempting a romantic interlude.
  • Stand over an important piece of electronic equipment and feign a hairball attack.
  • After your human has watched a particularly disturbing horror film, stand by the hall closet and then slowly back away, hissing and yowling.
  • While your human is sleeping, lie on their face.
Don't forget to visit Awww...Mondays!
Share This

23 comments:

  1. I don't like the hissing and yowling..it will surely scare me :)

    have a nice week ahead Sandee!

    ReplyDelete
  2. That was funny. I love the hissing and yowling.

    ReplyDelete
  3. My cats don't feign furballs over my electronics. srsly.

    Happy Monday! big hugs honey xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  4. While your human is sleeping, lie on their face... *LOL* That's the best! But i guess some might like the "warmness" or appreciate the shield from bright lights :)

    while lying on the face... try to toot and toottttttttt :p

    ReplyDelete
  5. bwahahahaahahahahahaha...and they know it!!!!

    Have a great week!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh what good ideas. We have written them all down to use on the Mom when necessary. We especially like the closet deal. That would really be a lot of fun.
    Have a great week Sandee. Hugs to Little Bit.

    ReplyDelete
  7. That's why I own DOGS!

    Joyce
    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  8. If you are a black cat play the witch role to keep the humans at bay with Halloween round the corner.

    ReplyDelete
  9. i thought those were all just normal cat behavior! ha ha ha

    smiles, bee
    xoxoxoxoox

    ReplyDelete
  10. Oh yeah - they know...

    ReplyDelete
  11. all true! They also wake you up for important bird watching stories

    ReplyDelete
  12. Plenty of good reasons for me to never get myself a cat as pet.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Our cat, Amber, has her own floor. She lives upstairs with a game room, bedroom (the guest room and is generally kept closed from Amber), and a bath.

    When our daughter visits the cat sleeps with her and often sleeps in her face. She doesn't do any of the other vices here that I know about.
    Since I'm 108 years old I wouldn't know about the second on your list.
    ..

    ReplyDelete
  14. Ha ha ha! This made me chuckle because most of it's happened to us over the years :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Yep they do have different ways of getting even with us.

    ReplyDelete
  16. oh yeah, any of these would be much more effective than scratching furniture. Duke would like to know if you will be posting a version for your canine friends but I told him you wouldn't...lol

    ReplyDelete
  17. Humans can be so dumb sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Our gray boy wants to do the face thing during the wee hours. Sigh. We no likey, but we sure luv him!

    Big hugs, honey...

    ReplyDelete
  19. Sandee.. check this out :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExZ0i04pSeY

    ReplyDelete
  20. oish did my comment go thru?..lol...HUGSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Nice read and amusing

    Have a great day :-)

    ReplyDelete
  22. I knew there were reasons we don't have cats (other than allergies).

    ReplyDelete
  23. My kitty has done all of these things!

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for stopping by my little corner of the blogosphere. All comments are very much appreciated.

♥♥♥Have a terrific day.♥♥♥