After 25 years of doing Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner for my family, we've canceled doing the Christmas dinner for this year. We are uncertain if we will ever do the dinners again. It's upsetting and heartbreaking.
We have a rule here that there is no hateful talk nor any arguments. We can't take the turmoil that some families seem to relish during the holidays. That's all we ask is that we have a peaceful day of visiting with each other and enjoying lots of moms great recipes. It seems like a reasonable request. Well it just didn't happen on Thanksgiving.
We started off okay and then one family member came in a bad mood. We tried to get things calmed down, but it continued to escalate until both hubby and I said, "That's enough." Well apparently they had had enough too. They got up right before dinner and left. And never came back. And never called. Nothing.
Hubby and I brooded about this and the hateful things that were said and decided to cancel Christmas. It's not fair to penalize everyone else, but we just aren't in the mood for this at all. We finally decided to let this family member know they were no longer welcome in our home. Of course they know why.
I'm hoping this can resolve itself in time, but I don't know if hubby and I can get over this one. I'm hoping we will. We don't wear our feelings on our sleeve, but this was way over the top.
The thing that I keep going back to is the rule that it's not okay to come here during the holidays to argue and upset everyone else. We have said this more than one year.
I'm really big on Christmas. I always have the tree up the day after Thanksgiving and you know it's Christmas at our house. I've not touched a thing and have no intention of putting up our tree, or any other Christmas decorations.
Have any of you had a similar problem?
What if anything did you do?
Any advice since I've not done anything like this before.