Wednesday, December 1, 2010

TSA

Can't see London, can't see France, unless we see your underpants.

Grope discounts available.

If we did our job any better we'd have to buy you dinner first.

Only we know if Lady Gaga is really a lady.

Don't worry, my hands are still warm from the last guy.

Wanna fly? Drop your fly.

We've handled more balls than Barney Frank.

We are now free to move about your pants.

We rub you the wrong way, so you can be on your way.

It's not a grope. It's a freedom pat.

When in doubt, we make you whip it out.

TSA: Touchin', Squeezin', Arrestin'.

YOU were a virgin.

We handle more packages than the USPS.

Stolen from: Phil of Phil's Phun

24 comments:

  1. Oh, my... Did you read John Heald's blog?

    Have a wonderful Wednesday, Sandee! Big hugs :]

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  2. HA! I feel violated already and I'm not traveling but now I'm fearing what I'll encounter at the gate :)

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  3. LOL these are too funny :) We're flying from Atlanta to Chicago next weekend with our 3 year old...wonder if she's going to get groped? Ugh, that just makes me shudder.

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  4. I'll catch up with you guys later, I'm having too much fun here at the security check.

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  5. I'm glad I don't normally fly anywhere. But, we better all make sure our undies don't have any holes in them...LOL!:-)

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  6. And you wondered why your Mother always told you to wear clean underwear.

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  7. Sandee, those are too funny!

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  8. hahaha...
    have a great day!

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  9. If I ever fly again, which is doubtful. I'm going to wear my underpants for a month then go through the security check..See what they find then..

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  10. I am with Greg. What a good idea. Just go in there really smelly. Those are all really funny though. Thank Cod I don't fly any more.
    Take care and have a great day.

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  11. I like Greg's Idea.The only way I'm gonna fly is I would have to sprout wings.

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  12. That's neat, Sandee. I doubt if I will steal any of those as I don't want to hurt any of those people's feelings. :) XD

    Wanna fly? Drop your fly.
    I think that is the encoded key to top droppers.
    ..

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  13. My husband flew last week, went thru the scanner, he thinks it's just fine. But then he works for the govt

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  14. my but things sure have changed haven't they? :)

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  15. I must be one of the only people in the country to actually feel BAD for the TSA agents. I mean, come on, I've seen some of the people that fly and I sure wouldn't want to be the one to have to do a pat-down on them!

    Besides, like Mo said, he'd rather have someone touch his junk than to blow up his junk!

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  16. Can't see London, can't see France, unless we see your underpants. Boy ain't that the truth!!! Can someone please tell me what the hell is going on. Did anyone see the TSA video a pregnant mom requested in order for her to bring her breast milk on a flight? Even though she reported it over a week before her flight and had the Homeland Security rules on her that stated it was a medical fluid and was allowed. Oh and she was held so long and was busted on by the TSA she missed her flight. Who wants to fly anymore? I am getting a boat like Sandee :-) BIG HUGS honey

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  17. Looking forward to it. I can't wait to get felt up.

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  18. My wife keeps telling me "If you don't get enough attention here, go to the airport."

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  19. it's time to cruise, not fly...

    smiles, bee
    xxoxoxooxox

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  20. For real. My family is NOT flying until they stop this nonsense, my daughter was molested a couple years ago and is absolutely terrified at the idea of some stranger touching her like that or looking at her naked body. I actually emailed the TSA through their complaint form--not bothering to read their reply email, it's probably just a form letter "we do the procedure as sensitively as possible" BS. And the real kicker? As I understand it the underwear bomber was put through one of the "strip search" scanners and the explosives weren't detected!

    I read a statistic recently that said 80% of respondents said they were OK with the strip search scanners and patdowns. Really? Think about that for a minute. Eighty Percent of the US public are OK with the idea of GIVING UP one of our most basic freedoms (think Fourth Amendment here, anyone who says these searches aren't unconstitutional is LYING), something that a war was fought to get for us and other wars were fought to keep. What is this country coming to? At what point do we stop "being Americans" in the accepted use of the term and just become sheep blindly following orders?

    Sorry I know the post was a joke but this subject really pisses me off.

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  21. Hey I just wanted to say that those are brilliant. I probably wouldn't say 'em to TSA personnel though. I saw you over on Tony McGurks blog. And I have long thought that we Americans fly around waaaaay waaaay too much. Hoping Amtrak will make a comeback. BTW from openid it may not be obvious, but I'm the autor of Tix-Comix.

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  22. Oh and Lady GaGa is a hermaphrodite, there were some pictures of her floating around the internet a while back wearing a minidress with her junk hanging out for all the world to see (going commando or something slipped out, I don't remember which). She was asked about it during an interview not long after and she said "I have a pussy and a peener, so what?" :-)

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