Thursday, October 15, 2009

The Explaination...

A wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman, and she was very upset.

'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce!'

The husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute so at least I can tell you what happened.'

'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'

The husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days.

So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in minutes.

Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.

Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight.

I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair just like them.'

The husband took a quick breath and continued, 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, 'Do you have anything else that you wife doesn't use?'

Hat tip: Nick M.
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  1. That was gooooood. Women of the world WISE up...If you've got a great husband, let him know it

  2. Ohhhh for lands sake ...........


    Hi Sandee !!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( gives bear hug )

  3. Oh yes, he's definitely got a point :-)

  4. Good one, and I'm a woman!

  5. Poor wife, too late for her to realize she miss the that important thing....

  6. Moral of the the wife use it or loose it.

    to the girl...don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

  7. Hahahahaha!!! I hear it all of the time from the husbands and the wives. Another great reason to be single. Pick and choose. Pick and choose!

  8. Oh, well, when you put it THAT way... bwahahaha!

    Big Hugs, Sandee ♥xo

  9. hahaha! I remember I have read a similar one earlier!

  10. Ha ha ha. The husband won the case.

  11. Hmmmm.... What about the husband big belly because of beer, picking nose habit and many other problems?

  12. Isn't there a saying that goes something like, "Use it, or lose it"? Just sayin'

  13. Wow. That was a sobering joke. :)

  14. Very funny!

    He's was just trying to be helpful.

  15. That is one very generous man. An inspiration.

  16. hahaha i wish it wont happen to me...poor wife..

  17. oh boy he got her good!

    smiles, bee

  18. He would be so dead!

    Big hugs from Mayberry...

  19. HA HA he really got her.

    Nice to see you're back at EC. After your yachting trip, time to get back down to business, oh YEAH (doing a little dance). Hate to tell you folks but you get to see my round MOB dot all day in a few days YIPPEE!!!!!

  20. Outstanding! I often find myself in situations where I have lots of ex-plaining to do, so I hope to be able to incorporate some of these tips into my next explanation! ;)

  21. Very prepared explanation the husband had there! Great post! Light but superbly intriguing. Nice one!

  22. Well, thank you:
    You made my Day;)

  23. Anonymous10/16/2009

    I am not sure I understood.
    Atleast it was not witty.
    I have been poor and profited from leftovers.
    Most poor people do not beg.
    Last time I met a begger, he said nothing, just sat there next to his dog.

    A begger can make me feel terribly rich.

    Two beggers is not only a nuisance. When two they are easily dangerous.

    Ever thought of that.


  24. Ouch. I actually saw that photo with the food as ehrm... someones chopped bodyparts at first.... I guess that tell something about my imagination... *giggles*

    There is obviously a lot to read into this story!

  25. YAYYYYYYYY! I'm gonna keep this in mind SANDEE. LOL!


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