Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Mergers...

With all the turmoil in the market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros and the acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America, this might be some good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations later this year.
  1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R Grace Co. will merge and become ~~ Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.
  2. Polygram Records, Warner Bros, and Zesta Saltines join forces and become ~~ Poly, Warner Cracker.
  3. 3M will merge with Goodyear and become ~~ MMM Good.
  4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Defasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become ~~ ZipAudiDoDa.
  5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS and become ~ ~ FedUp.
  6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become~~Fairwell Honeychild.
  7. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become ~~ Knott NOW.
  8. Victoria's Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name~~ TittytittyBangBang.
  9. Simplicity Patterns and publishing giant Simon & Schuster will be known as~~Simple Simon.
  10. A merger of the Bush Bean Co. and Maria Callendar Foods will produce~~Same Shit Different Day.
Stolen from: Hale McKay of It Occurred To Me
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30 comments:

  1. hahaha!!!what a great way to end my work day :) I shall wait for this merger..lol

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  2. Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace tickled me because it reminded me of my sister Janice. Janice is a bit naive, shall we say, and her husband is always calling her "Sister Mary Janice".

    (Mary is actually her legal first name but has always been called Janice). OK, too much to explain. Carry on then! :-D

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  3. I could really take to those mergers :-)

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  4. I think I'll just invest in Bed, Mattress & Boxsprings, Ltd ;-)

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  5. just found this morning, I love this, made my day take off to a wonderful start. Just not ready to invest in these yet, but will keep an eye out for these mergers. lmao

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  6. I can see Neil Cavuto announcing it all now! LOL!

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  7. very good one today!!!

    smiles, bee
    xxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

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  8. I love these mergers. They are interestin to say the least!

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  9. Groaners every one but I sure LOL'd

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  10. Walter and I found these the other day and just died laughing. This is a good one! Congrats on you winning the caption contest!

    I hope you have a great day!!
    Hugz,
    Jackie:-))

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  11. Some of these are pretty darned good actually!

    Have a great Wednesday, Sandee!

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  12. I want some shares of FedUp.

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  13. Maybe the stock market should just be known as Mergers R Us!

    LOL at TittytittyBangBang!

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  14. I'm glad you posted this one as I did as well.things are still shakey for me.

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  15. FedUp was really great.

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  16. Who thinks this stuff up? Wish it were me dammit!

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  17. What new funny and sarcastic names...!!!
    I enjoyed it! Cheers!

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  18. This is the best thing that I've read all day! VERY funny Sandee.

    Thanks for the giggle!

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  19. omigosh Sandee these made me laugh out loud!

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  20. HAHAHAHA....what a nice morning to start my day...

    You made my day terrific...Thanks

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  21. Wow! Funny as ever. Maybe merger is good for them to have a cooler name and nice service.

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  22. Good one! hehe

    Big hugs, honey...

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  23. Haven't we all been FedUp at one time or another.

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  24. LOL! This is hilarious.

    Would you be interested in exchanging links?

    Just let me know.
    - Rofl Stuffz

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  25. Sandee, as we often do when I visit here, Princess Gail and I had a good laugh!
    : D

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  26. This is exactly what I needed today. I'm FedUp! Hahahahahaaa. Thanks, Sandee :o)

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  27. Love it.

    At last some business news that I want to read.

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  28. laughing.....

    TittyTittyBangBang and FedUp are my faves.

    Sending you two hugs

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