Saturday, August 22, 2009

Colonoscopies

On the subject of Colonoscopies.

Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous.

A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!'
'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'
'Can you hear me NOW?'
'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'
'You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married.'
'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'
'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'
'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'
'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!'
'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'
'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'
'Oh boy! That was sphincterrific!'
'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'

Hat tip: Matt of Matt-Speak
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31 comments:

  1. Those are funny. I'll have to remember those... #8 is my favorite...

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  2. Yes, #13. Your head probably is up there! No note for you. Come back one year. bwahahahaha!

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  3. I LOVED these!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAH


    I loved the last one about the note to his wife!

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  4. Maybe that's what I should tell my bride after our next "discussion", "Yes dear, my head is up my butt because I'm looking for what little dignity I have left."

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  5. HAHAHAHA...i like the #13..hahaha

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  6. sarge goes wednesday, i hope he reads these! ha ha ha

    smiles, bee
    xxoxoxoxoxoxoxxo

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  7. LOL, "A note for his wife"!!!!

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  8. Those are great. I personally thought that #5 and #13 were funny as hell. I give the nod to #13...

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  9. Well, if you can't have a sense of humor during these sorts of procedures it does make them a lot worse to go through!

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  10. Thanks for this important series, very cleverly presented. . . .
    I'm having mine next week!

    Aloha-
    Comfort Spiral

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  11. My favorites were the "find my dignity" statement and the "note to the wife".

    Colonoscopies are a crummy fact of life. At least we can laugh about them.

    I hope you are having a nice weekend!

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  12. I'll go for #10!

    Happy weekend :-)

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  13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'

    That's too funny!!!!

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  14. LOL oh my just what I needed as I am scheduled for my own in a few weeks. I need to use a few of these on my doc.

    Have a great weekend

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  15. I'm like you, I slept through it all. So if I talked nobody told me about it.

    Being a guy, I will stay away from those mentioned before. They appear to be feministic.
    So, I opt for a good fun one where no one gets hurt feelings, except for the little guy who cant' fight me: # 8, "'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'"
    ..

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  16. Laughing, those are great. My favorites are #10 and #13.

    I have a token of appreciation for you on A Nice Place In The Sun. I just wanted to let you know...

    Have a great week-end...and don't do anything I wouldn't do.;)

    Big hug, and love,

    Annie

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  17. These were worth waiting for....Thanks!

    Guess what?? Another award is waiting for you over at Candles, Crafts and Whatnot. Congrats!

    :) Kat

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  19. #13, please! These all tickled my funny bone. Big hugs, honey...

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  20. Thanks for an insightful post. These tips are really helpful. Again thanks for sharing your knowledge with us.

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  21. A very clever idea, will implement it as soon as possible. Keep up the good work.

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  22. Oh my! Haha! Those comments made my day.
    Being a total geek, of course I like the first one the most.
    Maybe Spock is in there too? :D

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  23. Its really one of the best post. I got a lot of useful things from this post. Thanks for sharing such a great and informative post with us. Keep blogging.

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  24. Hi! I really love that and its one of my likable lines,so one of the nice post I just enjoy all the points,thanks for the post.......ha.ha.ha.....:lol:

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  25. This is really an innovative one. My favorites are #11 and #12. Thanks a bunch for sharing such creative and interesting post with us. Keep blogging.

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  26. Wow its really very funny one and innovative.Thanks for the nice post,hahaha....:lol:

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  27. Hi! This is the one blog which I visit from last two weeks and I really like this and it helps me a lot so stay tune with us and keep post continue.Thanks

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  28. Colonoscopies is the one which give me a nice informations on it and make me merrymaking so nice post and I think you spend a nice weekend.Thanks a lot.

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