Saturday, May 9, 2009

From Bad to Worse

A man walks into a bar and orders a double, obviously upset.

"What's the matter, buddy?" asks the bartender.

"It's a long story. I met this beautiful woman who invited me back home. We stripped off our clothes and jumped into bed and were just about to make love when her darned husband came in the front door. So I had to jump out of the bedroom window and hang from the edge by my fingernails without any clothes on!"

"Gee, that's tough!" commiserated the bartender.

"Right, but that's not what really got me aggravated. When her husband came into the room, he wanted to have sex with her -- but he had to piss first. And the lazy son of a gun pissed out the window right onto my head!"

"Yeech! No wonder you're in a lousy mood."

"Yeah, but I haven't told you what really really made me mad. Next, I had to listen to them grunting and groaning and when they finished the husband tossed his condom out the window. And where does it land? On my damned forehead!"

"Damn, that really is a drag!"

"Oh, I'm not finished! See, what really pissed me off was when the husband had to take a dump. Turns out that their toilet was broken, so he stuck his ass out of the window and let loose right on my head!"

"That would sure mess up my day."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, but do you know what REALLY, REALLY, REALLY pissed me off? When I looked down and saw that my feet were only SIX inches off the ground!"

Stolen from: Hale McKay of It Occurred To Me
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23 comments:

  1. that guy is a nut... LMAO...

    take care mate... cheers...

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  2. Lol... He deserved it ^^

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  3. You ALWAYS look before you leap!

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  4. Ditto to DrillerAA!!!

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  5. This sounds like my kind of luck! *LOL*

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  6. I got this in an email the other day. If you play in someone else's sandbox, you're gonna get dirty.

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  7. Talk about just deserts!

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  8. as if the husband didn't know...

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  9. 6 inches - not sure I have much sympathy for him.

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  10. What a dumb ass!Six inches off the ground!

    Happy Mother's Day

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  11. So the moral is: Always check how soon you get get your feet on the ground :-)

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  12. I'm not sure if he will learn...

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  13. Here's your sign!
    Big hugs...

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  14. oh he did have a bad day...

    smiles, bee
    xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

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  15. Oh, Sandee, why have I been away so long! Every time I visit this hilarious place I LOL or LMAO, today the latter!

    Happy Mother's Day if you are a mother!

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  16. Happy Mother's Day...if appropriate!!

    Big hugs!

    Lydia

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  17. You know how you sometimes, while reading the story/joke, read ahead ... glance down and catch a word or two?

    I glanced down and saw "6 inches" and expected to find something totally different at the end of this joke.

    Ha!

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  18. Oh hahahahahahahahaha, that is something else... like someone said, look before leaping... craziness... hahahahah... much love, hugs and :))))

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  19. ho ho ho haha ,
    I think I would have stayed in bed;))

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  20. Lesson learned?

    Don't fool around!

    Paul

    Eat Well. Live Well.
    PurpleGreenPops.com

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