A woman recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home. One day she picked up the urn he was in and poured him out on the coffee table.Then she started talking to him, and tracing her fingers in the ashes, she said, "You know that fur coat you promised me, Irving?" She followed by saying, "I bought it with the insurance money."
She then said, "Irving, remember that new car you promised me?" She answered again saying, "Well, I bought it with the insurance money."
Then she said, "And remember the big beautiful house that sits at the top of the hill that I fell in love with and you said we couldn't afford?" Once more she answered saying, "Well I bought that too with the insurance money and I love living here."
Still tracing her finger in the ashes, she said, "Irving, remember that blow job I promised you? Here it comes . . . "
Stolen from: Hale McKay of It Occurred To Me














36 Brilliant Opinions:
Now that's the way to scatter ashes.
:0
cold! lol
hey it was a cheap funny story
Ashes to ashes,
dust to dust,
*aaaaaaaCHOOOO*
...oh, hecky darn poo...
*sound of vacuum cleaner*
*part of the ash is smiling*
I still find this one funny! I've missed my daily dose of laughs. Big hugs, honey...
Needed the laugh this morning - thanks!
Well, you know what they say, "Ashes to ashes." Irving, that giant sucking sound you hear... it's not what you were hoping for, that's the vacuum cleaner.
She must have a really good dust buster!
You reap what you sew.....
this is really funny!!! it made my day... errrr night... lol :D
I made the comment once to a friend of mine whose mom had been recently created that he should take her urn into his den, remove the top and let her watch t.v.
I haven't heard from him since and that was 25 years ago. Oversensitive bastard. (True story)
This is a funny story!
uh oh! ha ha ha
smiles, bee
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Hahahaha! I guess he deserved it. I would take "him" outside though ;o)
Good things come to those who wait! ahahaha!
Hmmmmmmmn, cold, but, funny.... life is fascinatingly hilarious, yes...
Have a beautiful day, much love, hugs and :))))
LOL... she's nasty but funny!
wow thats funny. I actually have heard it before but has a differing impact since my hubbies ashes are siting on a shelf!
hummmmmm one last blow job
Still LMAO, I really wasn't expecting that at the end, wicked!!!
Oh my!
Where does Hale come up with these funnies?
LMAO
oh jesus I SHOULD have seen that coming.
hahahahah, That is funny every time I read it! Love it
Hey Sandee, this is neat. Neater still is Hale Mac in that he had a tribute to blogging guru, Old Hoss. I never did visit his blog but had read his comments which are plastered all over the blogging places.
Hugs returned to you, :). This will be Karen's first child. She is our youngest daughter and Mrs. Jim's first blood relative grandchild. :-)
..
tee hee...
Love It!!!
Didn't expect the last line, it made me laugh out loud!!
Thanks!!
tee hee! what a riot!
omg...great!!!
LOL... too much :)
works for me! big hug.
Stolen form "It Occurred to me"??????????????????????
Well deserved ending.
... but she should take them outside first!
Wait. Did I miss that she was sitting OUTSIDE?
Funny.
Ah hah!
I KNEW she was inside!
I knew it.
Heeeheeeee
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