Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Dictionary for Men - Part I

"It's a guy thing." Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

"Can I help with dinner?" Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"Uh huh," "Sure, Honey," or Dear." Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"It would take too long to explain." Translated: "I have no idea how it works."

"I was listening to you. It's just that I have things on my mind." Translated: "That girl standing on the corner is a real babe."

"Take a break honey, you're working too hard." Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"That's interesting, dear." Translated: "Are you still talking?"

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31 Brilliant Opinions:

anthonynorth on June 30, 2009 12:37 AM said...

Tsk, tsk. Such stereotyping :-)
Loved it.

barb on June 30, 2009 5:16 AM said...

Two of the happiest marriages I have had the pleasure witness are my parent's and my Sister Lynda & BIL Rick's. My Dad and Rick both have the same philosophy and response when asked about the secret to a long and happy marriage - It's the ability to say "Yes, Dear" with the proper tone and inflection. If you can get that right, the bowing is optional. hahaha!

Arv on June 30, 2009 5:24 AM said...

lol... some of it may be true :P

Diane on June 30, 2009 5:47 AM said...

lmao i love these!

star8278 on June 30, 2009 5:52 AM said...

Thank goodness Hubby wouldn't dare try any of these with me. The worst I get from him would be something to do with cars, I am sure.

Margo on June 30, 2009 6:23 AM said...

in my brilliant opinion, this is brilliant.

Ivanhoe on June 30, 2009 8:37 AM said...

I'm liking these even more than the women ones :o)
"Take a break, honey" rocks!

Mary Anne Gruen on June 30, 2009 8:41 AM said...

I love it! I've GOT to get my husband to read this. LOL

Jack K. on June 30, 2009 8:51 AM said...

Obviously written by a woman. You wonder how I know that, it's a guy thing. snerx.

ROTFLMAO.

Great post, just like the woman's post that preceded it.

Bingo on June 30, 2009 9:05 AM said...

I love it too, I'm looking forward for the second part.

Sherry on June 30, 2009 9:08 AM said...

Oh, my gosh. Those are SO true!

Desert Songbird on June 30, 2009 9:15 AM said...

So informative, Sandee. *grin*

Lois Grebowski on June 30, 2009 10:35 AM said...

you got that right! Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!

Ferd on June 30, 2009 11:34 AM said...

That's interesting, Sandee.
I would tell to you how the male mind really works, but it would take too long to explain.
; )

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) on June 30, 2009 1:52 PM said...

i am glad you told me this, i always thought when sarge said it would take too long to explain he meant he thought i was too stupid to understand, now i know he is too dumb to tell me! ha ha ha ha ha

smiles, bee
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

RennyBA on June 30, 2009 2:35 PM said...

That's interesting, dear! :-)

Ron Russell on June 30, 2009 5:38 PM said...

From a guy point of view: she, honey I have a headache--translation--not again tonight.

Skunkfeathers on June 30, 2009 5:56 PM said...

I've used "Yes, Dear" a number of times over the years. I apparently never got the right tone and inflection, but I did use it ;)

Lynda on June 30, 2009 6:21 PM said...

hahahahahahahaha, too true, and stereotype or not, all too common... good one...
luv you much, hugs and :)))) have a great night!!!!

Sandy B on June 30, 2009 6:55 PM said...

Too true!!! Big hugs, honey.

The BoBo on June 30, 2009 7:08 PM said...

And then there's "Sure, I'll get to it later, hon" which means - I'm busy right now and I'll forget what you said and ask you again later.

Linda on June 30, 2009 7:10 PM said...

I'm sure hoping you have one of these dictionaries for teenagers, too!

Rhonda on June 30, 2009 7:18 PM said...

My husband would never say or mean any of these quotes! LOL!!!!!
;)

Northwest Minuteman on June 30, 2009 7:47 PM said...

It would be a whole lot funnier if it weren't so true!

DrillerAA09 on June 30, 2009 8:19 PM said...

I don't get it! It must be a guy thing, but that would take too long to explain and I have other things on my mind!

Amazing Gracie on June 30, 2009 8:48 PM said...

It's that whole Mars and Venus kinda thing! It works well in my home!
Enjoy your "cool" break.
~~~Blessings~~~

insurance on June 30, 2009 9:04 PM said...

Read to your blog make younger

katherine. on July 01, 2009 8:59 AM said...

the "I was listening/things on my mind" response is not well received.

smile.

unusual scenester on January 05, 2010 6:38 PM said...

When in doubt, faking an extended coughing fit is usually a better answer than anything you can actually say

 

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