Monday, December 31, 2007

2008 Contract

After serious & cautious consideration...your contract of friendship has been for the New Year 2008!

It was a very hard decision to make. So try not to screw it up!!!

My Wish for You in 2008...

May peace break into your house and may thieves come to steal your debts. May the pockets of your jeans become a magnet of $100 bills. May love stick to your face like Vaseline and may laughter assault your lips! May your clothes smell of success like smoking tires and may happiness slap you across the face and may your tears be that of joy. May the problems you had forget your home address! In simple words...

May 2008 be the best year of your life!!!

Don't make someone a priority, if they only made you an option!

Labels: Holidays

Give Me Five Monday

Here is the challenge this week:

Give Me Five ideas for kicking off your new year whether that be party suggestions or weight loss ideas or simply goals you have or crafty ideas you have been thinking about starting, the sky is the limit on this one!

I haven't done resolutions in years, but I do have some things that are always on my list. They include the fun side of life.

Boat more. Yep, I plan on even having a bigger year boating than last and that's saying a lot.
Be the best port captain I can be for our yacht club. It will be a new learning curve and I'm ready for that.
Spend even more time with family and friends than last year.
Maintain all my great blogging pals and develop new blogging buddies this coming year.
Enjoy each and every day as the gift it is. As we get older the days, weeks, months and years become more precious. Happy New Year everyone.

Give Me Five Participants

1. BeccA's Buzz
2. Serena

3. maryt/theteach
4. DrillerAA

Learn more about Give Me Five here.
Get The Code

Labels: Give Me Five

Sunday, December 30, 2007

Manic Monday #40 - Key

The Key to Identifying Where a Driver is From

Chicago - One hand on wheel, one hand on horn.
New York - One hand on wheel, one finger out window.
Boston - One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator.
California - One hand on wheel, cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator.
Los Angeles - With gun in lap.
Ohio - Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror, but driving in California.
Italy - Both hands in air, gesturing, both feet on accelerator, head turned to talk to someone in back seat.
Seattle - One hand on latte, one knee on wheel, cradling cell phone, foot on brake, mind on game.
Texas city male - One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating between both feet being on the accelerator and both on the brake, throwing a McDonalds bag out the window.
Texas country male - One hand on wheel, one hand hanging out the window, keeping speed steadily at 70mph, driving down the center of the road unless coming around a blind curve, in which case they are on the left side of the road.
Texas female - One hand constantly refocusing the rear-view mirror to show different angles of the BIG hair, one hand going between mousse, brush, and rat-tail to keep the helmet hair going, both feet on the accelerator, poodle steering the car, chrome .38 revolver with mother of pearl inlaid handle in the glove compartment.
West Virginia - Four-wheel drive pickup truck, shotgun mounted in rear window, beer cans on floor, squirrel tails attached to antenna.
Florida - Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above window level, driving 35MPH on the interstate in the left lane with the left blinker on.
Colorado: One hand on wheel, one hand holding cell phone, both feet on accelerator, weaving from lane to lane without turn signals, wearing a parka, shorts, and Birkenstocks. Thanks Ian Healy of EDog's Everything Page for the addition of Colorado.

Manic Monday Participants

1. SargeCharlie
2. maryt/theteach
3. empress bee (of the high sea)
4. Ian
5. And Miles to Go...
6. Meloncutter
7. Shelia
8. Crazy Working Mom

9. Deb
10. julie
11. Travis
12. Lois
13. Blog That Mommy!
14. frenchkys
15. Jamie
16. katherine

17. Nancy Liedel - The Goat Rodeo
18. Jannaverse
19. Jantics
20. Jantrails
21. Harlekwin
22. Matt-Man
23. Desert Songbird

Learn more about Manic Monday here.
View More Manic Monday Participants
Get The Code

Labels: Manic Monday

Great Blog Award 2007

Mauro of 1 Million Love Messages awared me with the "Great Blog Award" 2007. How cool is that? Here is his list of awardees:

1-Cotojo 2-Lisa -Deborah 4-Pearl 5-Sandy 6-Jesse 7-Chris 8-Santa 9-BlogElf 10-Jackie 11-Marzie 12-Adrian 13- 15-NAFASG 14-PolliwogFrog 15-Sue 16-Kathy 17-Maartje 18-Morgan 19-Greg 20-MaryAnn 21-Eric 22-Hawk 23-Carol 24-Diane 25-EvNucci 26-Surjit 27-Kuanyin 28-ChristyZ 29-Sandee 30-Robin 31-Hanna 32-Maunie 33-Kim 34-Bobby 35-Billy 36-David 37-Jennifer 38-Aryst 39-Winston 40-Christy 41-LilyRuth 42-Jess 43-Rudy 44-Lynda 45-Lili 46-SandyG 47-Ange 48-BlackWyrm 49-Vincent 50-Colin&Anne 51-BlandlyUrbane 52-Marco 53-Mihaela 54-John 55-Aziz 56-Ugyen 57-Lansy 58-Alex 59-Victors 60-Nostalgia 61-Franco 62-Herby 63-Rubie 64-Santaram&BVK 65-Jean-David 66-Namgay 67-Catherine 68-Yunita 69-PJLighthouse 70-Lorimer 71-DreamCatcher 72-Fred 73-Anja 74-MariaLourdes 75-JonB 76-Aayush 77-Denise 78-Dharmendra 79-BrentD 80-Jerry&Daryl 81-BrianB 82-Calvin 83-Pieter 84-Jessica 85-Taflas 86-Alex 87-Norie 88-Justin 89-Ashish 90-David 91-Thanate 92-Kevin 93-Etienne 94-Gerbera 95-Christina 96-AbhishekD 97-Uprai 98-TexasJam 99-Azmiel 100-Daniel 101-Kristin 102-Luwis 103-Adavait 104-NowSourcing 105-BuenAmigo 106-Kiran 107-Peterson 108-Lynn 109-Chessnoid 110-LuisHipolito 111-Joliveira 112-Jennifer&Pete 113-TeamDog 114-Megan 115-Mark 116-Raivyn 117-Mel 118-Andrea 119-Jen 120-Mimi 121-Bobo 122-Lynda 123-DreadBob 124-Julie 125-RennyBA 126-Bobbarama 127-Becky 128-Magdalena 129-Michelle 130-Stacie 131-ClimateTeam 132-CashMarble 133-OilOffShore 134-Piper 135-Barbara 136-Ann 137-Deb 138-Headbanger 139-Danny 140-Morina 141-Aira 142-Jericho 143-Jeane Michelle 144-Breigh 145-SecretMind 146-Awannabe 147-Gerri 148-Colin 149-eRocker 150-Kitty 151-Mariuca 152-Donna 153-Babyshern 154-Sanni 155-SatoNa 156-Cyn 157-Nessa 158-Steve 159-Francisco 160-Em 161-Christo 162-Riccardo 163-Naren 164-Denise 165-KingTang 166-El 167-Francesco 168-Bella 169-Chris 170-Fe 171-Jim&Emma 172-Incinq 173-Cristian 174-Matson 175-Kiwipulse 176-Sean 177-Anne 178-Xerendipity 179-Omega 180-Debra 181-SJ 182-Joseph 183-Nikki 184-Pocholo 185-BloggerNoob 186-Filot 187-Aseem 188-Mark 189-Antonio 190-Henry 191-Jamiz 192-Tamsyn 193-EverydayWeekender 194-JustMe 195-Brent 196-Ink 197-Alan 198-Debbie 199- BlueRibbonBloggers 200- Me

Now it's my turn to award this cool badge to those folks I think have great blogs. Well, that's easy. Everyone on my buddy list has a great blog. Remember, you do not have to participate if you don't want to.

Labels: Awards

The Builder and the Priest

A builder and a priest are out for a game of golf one afternoon. Unfortunately the builder wasn't very good at the game and every time he missed a shot would shout 'Sh*t, missed'.

The game went on and after several outbursts from the builder; the priest could hold his tongue no longer. "Don't swear like that" he told his friend, "or God will punish you". The builder apologized and the game continued.

As soon as he missed another shot the builder shouted "Sh*t, missed." and continued to do this every time he missed a shot for the next three holes. The priest was starting to get really angry by now and said "I must insist that you stop swearing this instant, otherwise God will hear you and punish you!"

Once again, his pleas made no difference as the builder missed an easy putt on the seventeenth green and shouted out "Sh*t, missed". Immediately the heavens parted and a bolt of lightning flew from the sky, hitting the priest and killing him stone dead.

Suddenly, a booming voice was heard in the clouds, "Sh*t, missed!"

Labels: Religious Humor

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Bloggers of the World Award

Colin of Life has awarded me with the Bloggers of the World award. Thank you Colin. Here's what he had to say about this award:

I have met so many wonderful people in the 9 months that I have been blogging. My first blog was Free PC Security, and 3 months later this blog sprang into life and has been a greater success than I could ever have imagined. The blogosphere has expanded to include all countries and nationalities, where barriers and borders do not exist. We have all come together to create a truly universal family, which I am proud to be a part of. You all know who you are, and I thank you for making me feel so welcome. I wish each and every one a Very Happy New Year, and hope that you enjoy good health, peace and prosperity throughout 2008.

Here's all the folks that Colin gave this award to:

0-Cotojo 1-Lisa , 2-Kim, 3-Deborah, 4-Pearl, 5-Sandy, 6-Jesse, 7-Chris, 8- Colin , 9-Santa, 10-Blog Elf, 11-Jackie, 12-Marzie, 13-Adrian, 14-Jos, 15-NAFA SG, 16-Paula, 17-Sue, 18-Kathy 19-Maartje, 20-Morgan, 21-Greg, 22-MaryAnn, 23-Eric, 24-Hawk, 25-Carol, 26-Diane, 27-Ev Nucci, 28-Surjit, 29-Kuanyin, 30-Christy Z, 31-Sandee, 32-Robin, 33-Hanna, 34-Maunie, 35-Kim, 36-Bobby, 37-Billy, 38-David, 39-Jennifer, 40-Aryst, 41-Winston, 42-Christy, 43-LilyRuth, 44-Jess, 45-Rudy, 46-Lynda, 47-Lili, 48-Sandy G, 49-Ange, 50-BlackWyrm, 51-Vincent, 52-Colin & Anne, 53-Blandly Urbane, 54-Marco, 55-Mihaela Lica, 56-John C, 57-Aziz-sm, 58-Ugyen, 59-Lansy, 60-Alex Badalic, 61-Victors, 62-Nostalgia Manila, 63-Franco Yong, 64-Herby, 65-Rubie, 66-Santaram & BVK, 67-Jean-david, 68-Namgay, 69-Catherine, 70-Yunita P, 71-Debbie Dolphin, 72-Lorimer Black, 73-Dream Catcher, 74-Fred Plimley, 75-Anja Merret, 76-Maria Lourdes, 77-Jon B, 78-Aayush, 79-Denise, 80-Dharmendra P, 81-Brent D, 82-Jerry & Daryl McCoy, 83-Brian B, 84-Calvin Innes, 85-Pieter Marburn, 86-Jessica Field, 87-Taflas, 88-Alex Sysoef, 89-Norie, 90-Justin Stanley, 91-Ashish, 92-David Ledoux, 93-Thanate Tan, 94-Kevin, 95-Etienne, 96-Gerbera, 97-Christina, 98-Abhishek d, 99-Uprai, 100-Texas_Jam, 101-Azmiel, 102-Daniel, 103-Kristin B, 104-Luwis, 105-Adavait, 106-Now Sourcing, 107-Buen Amigo, 108-Kiran Pande, 109-Peterson Wong, 110-Lynn, 111-Chessnoid, 112-Luis Hipolito, 113-Joliveira, 114-Jennifer & Pete, 115-Team Dog, 116-Megan, 117-Mark, 118-Raivyn, 119-Mel, 120-Andrea, 121-Jen / domestika, 122-Mimi, 123-Bobo, 124-Lynda Lehmann, 125-Dread Bob, 126-Julie, 127-RennyBA, 128-Bobbarama, 129-Becky, 130-Magdalena, 131-Michelle, 132-Stacie, 133-Climate of Our Future Team, 134-CashMarble, 135-OilOffShoreMarine, 136-Jos Additional BlogLove, 137-Piper, 138-Barbara, 139-Ann Clemmons, 140-Deb, 141-madang.com, 142-RamblingMoo.com, 143-blogginginmypyjamas, 144-StylewithPassion, 145-Chinneeq, 146-Dora-zooropazoo, 147-Babyshern, 148-HiPnCooLMoMMa 149-Rachel’s Soulful Thoughts 150-When Silence Speaks, 151-Dancing in Midlife Tune, 152-Underneath it All, 153- I am Dzoi, 154-Hobbies and Such, 155-moms…..check nyo, 156-Choc Mint Girl, 157-Amel’s Realm, 158- My Thoughts, 159-Rusin Roundup, 160-Juliana’s Site, 161-Max, 162-Rooms of My Heart, 163-A Great Pleasure, 164-LadyJava’s Lounge, 165-Jesie, 166-Steven, 167-Trinity, 168-Leena, 169-Nick, 170-Nessa, 171-Debbie Dolphin, 172- Anna t, 173-krrey_boo, 174-Logic, 175-Steve Ho, 176-Virtual Entrepreneur, 177-WalksFarWoman, 178-Anna, Beth & Cory’s Mom, 179-Toon, 180-Belinda 181-EPSpeaks, 182-Teacher Julie 183-jafajfer, 184-pmonchet, 185-Aslan, 186-arouetvoltaire , 187-Tanny, 188-Il vaso di Pandora, 189-Non Lineare, 190-Omniamundamundis, 191-LineaNeuronica, 192-Semplicemente Lisa 193-la penna che graffia 194-Angelbaby, 195-Divya, 196-Cyn, 197-Donna, 198-Liudmila, 199-djeblog, 200-Gracie Belle, 201-Reverend Ray, 202-Walter Winstuff, 203-Denny, 204-Terry (mee mOe), 205-awannabe, 206-Z.S., 207-Il Gnagnera, 208-Kevin Grieves, 209-DatCurious, 210-DatMoney, 211-Sanni, 212-Rolando’s Quiet Space, 213-SatoNa , 214-Levian , 215-21Knots, 216-PuTLie, 217-Riciard’s, 218-Darlene, 219-Rantings of a Woman, 220-La Place de Cherie , 221-Enjoying The Ride, 222-A Window To Our World,223-Juliana, 224-Retchel’s Pure Life, 225-We Are Family, 226-Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow, 227-Echoes of Life, 228-My 3 Boys and I,229-Mammagatta, 230-Juliana’s Lair, 231-Bless Sanctuary,232-Confessions of An Army Wife , 233-Jean’s my So-called Life, 234-So cute tiny pixels,235-Denz Techtronics Blog, 236-Wanna Be On Top!, 237-Carpe Diem, 238-My so-called Life, 239-TEEBOB, 240-Kikay, 241-Alaverde33, 242-CC’s Lifestyles and Reviews, 243-Pinay’s Lifestyles, 244-Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow, 245-The Creativity Of Me, 246-OzLife247-Scattered Thoughts of Mine, 248-Another Journal of Mine, 249-My Drama, 250-By The Way, 251-Paul, Toni and Lance - Bridging the Distance, 252-Live Love Pink, 253-In The Lance’s Mind, 254-My Life, 255-Rants and Ramblings, 256-WorldBlog, 257-Our Journey to Life, 258-Simply the best, 259-Paul and Toni, 260-Alpha’s Blog, 261-because life is fun, 262-The Simple Life of a Baghag, 263-Rose DesRochers, 264-Sweet Lullaby, 265-AnitoKid, 266- Lisa WAHM, 267-Ben Spark, 268-Kesa, 269-Mauro, 270-Sindi 271-Alianorah, 272-Jennie, 273-CTN, 274-Jeremy, 275-Polliwog Frog, 276-Yvette, 277-Ali (DorisDay), 278-Rodney, 279-Alice, 280- WBAustin, 281-Max, 282-Rodney, 283-Karen, 284-Michelle, 285-Stacy, 286-SvenMarin, 287-CoolingStar9, 288-Billy Jack, 289-bbrian, 290-Cris Zimermann, 291-Franx, 292-Ramil, 293-JaniceNW, 294-Cathrina Jones, 295-Bels, 296-Raman, 297-Jeques, 298-NPSG, 299-Anndi, 300-Georganna, 301-Jeane Michelle Culp, 302-Sam Chan, 303-Kumowai

Have a very Happy New Year. I award this cool badge to the following awesome bloggers: Everyone in my buddy list.

Labels: Awards

Political Correctness

Political Correctness is a doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

Labels: Political Humor

Misunderstanding...

Some time ago Mr. Clinton was hosting a state dinner when at the last minute his regular cook took ill and they had to get a replacement at short notice. The fellow arrived and turned out to be a very grubby looking man named Jon. The President voiced his concerns to his chief of staff but was told that this was the best they could do at such short notice.

Just before the meal, the President noticed the cook sticking his fingers in the soup to taste it and again he complained to the chief of staff about the cook, but he was told that this man was supposed to be a very good chef. The meal went okay but the President was sure that the soup tasted a little off, and by the time dessert came, he was starting to have stomach cramps and nausea.

It was getting worse and worse till finally he had to excuse himself from the state
dinner to look for the bathroom. Passing through the kitchen, he caught sight of the cook, Jon, scratching his rear end and this made him feel even worse. By now he was desperately ill with violent cramps and was so disorientated that he couldn't remember which door led to the bathroom.

He was on the verge of passing out from the pain when he finally found a door that opened and as he undid his trousers and ran in, he realised to his horror that he had stumbled into Monica Lewinsky's office with his trousers around his knees.

As he was just about to pass out, she bent over him and heard her president whisper in a barely audible voice, "sack my cook".

And that is how the whole misunderstanding occurred.

Labels: Political Humor

Friday, December 28, 2007

Friday's Feast - #173

Appetizer
Name 2 things you would like to accomplish in 2008.
Still be upright at the end of 2008, and to have more fun boating than I did this year. I'm not sure the last one is possible though.

Soup
With which cartoon character do you share personality traits?
Bucky Katt. I have that that same smart mouth, and dry sense of humor. Look at my header...that's Bucky Katt. He's a newspaper comic strip.

Salad
What time of day (or night) were you born?
That was a whole lot of years ago, but I remember it was on a Saturday and that in was around 9 in the morning.

Main Course
Tell us something special about your hometown.
Watching it disappear into the distance the day I left. I just hated my hometown, but most kids do long for some place else to be.

Dessert
If you could receive a letter from anyone in the world, who would you want to get one from?
Tom Selleck, who else.

Friday's Feast Participants

1. peppylady
2. Kara
3. forgetfulone
4. Gattina
5. Serena
6. Lois
7. OneLuvGurl
8. Shabem
9. liza
10. a simple life
11. AmandaA
12. Manny
13. Jane
14. Eleisia
15. Mensch71
16. SargeCharlie
17. Allie B
18. Titania
19. lyn
20. Jennifer
21. Gabriel
22. Olivia
23. MeL
24. Dallas >^^< Meow
25. maiylah
26. Matt-Man
27. toni
28. Jenny A.
29. Bethany
30. Natalie
31. Deb
32. Patti
33. Michael - Lover of Amy
34. Eds
35. Liza
36. Toni

37. Yen
38. Dee
39. JHS
40. Amy
41. Bubba's Sis
42. Kristin
43. Shelly
44. The Gal Herself
45. Alice
46. Michele
47. Bea
48. Recel
49. Reba
50. Super Duper Fantastic
51. Suki
52. Jo
53. Misslionheart♥
54. Braden
55. Helena
56. Jodi
57. Nita
58. Allie B
59. Mish
60. Laane
61. Coco
62. Miz Booshay
63. bonggamom
64. Judy
65. Jen
66. Leni
67. Logtar
68. Ley
69. Chimpotle
70. J.D. Long
71. Linda C at 2nd Cup
72. Annie

73. Just Maddi
74. Bailey's Granny
75. Miss Patti
76. Amanda A
77. Dawn
78. Peppy Lady
79. Ladytink_534
80. Michelle
81. Lori Madison
82. Fresh Girl
83. Christine
84. Penelope Anne
85. Shabem
86. Debbie
87. Kay
88. Autumn
89. Bellezza
90. Kwizgiver
91. Robin
92. kat in ga
93. Gabriel
94. Stacy
95. Trace
96. Tere
97. Cat.
98. Carol
99. Katie
100. Leanne
101. Antoinette
102. Gellianne
103. Nate
104. Stone Girl
105. crickl's nest
106. Saturn
107. TSC Girl

Friday's Feast Home
View More Friday's Feast Participants

Labels: Friday's Feast

Thursday, December 27, 2007

The Barber

A man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to Rome. He mentioned the trip to the barber who responded, "Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded, dirty and full of Italians. You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking TWA," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"TWA?" exclaimed the barber. "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are rude, and they're always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at the downtown International Marriott."

"That dump! That's the worst hotel in the city. The rooms are small, the service is surly and they're overpriced. So, whatcha doing when you get there?"

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and we hope to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the barber. "You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the man again came in for his regular haircut. The barber asked him about his trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful," explained the man, "not only were we on time in one of TWA's brand new planes, but it was overbooked and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a beautiful 28 year old stewardess who waited on me hand and foot. And the hotel - it was great! They'd just finished a $25 million remodeling job and now it's the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us the presidential suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the barber, "I know you didn't get to see the Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, for as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder and explained that the Pope likes to personally meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke to me."

"Really?" asked the Barber. "What'd he say?"

"He said, 'Where'd you get the lousy haircut?'"

Labels: Ironic Humor

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Technorati LinkLOve Back To You

I stole this idea from Jos at NoDirectOn (Not:NoDirection).

In the scroll box below are the blogs that were kind enough to link to this blog in the last 10 days. That is... the ones that Technorati counted... I have copy/pasted the Tecnorati pages with "blog reactions", changed the rel="bookmark" to rel="dofollow", deleted the images, and.. hey presto! Hope this works to give you some LinkLOve back (If it works, it will give a lot of LinkLOve to Technorati, too ;). Thank you for linking to 'Comedy Plus'!